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The office toaster that took 45 minutes to toast one bagel

Our break room toaster has one dial that says 'light' to 'dark' but no numbers, so I set it to the middle for a bagel and it came out pale, then I cranked it to the edge and it nearly smoked out the whole floor in Ridgewood. After five tries and burning two bagels, I realized the thing cycles twice before popping, so the dial is basically a suggestion. Does anyone else have a mystery appliance at work that eats up more break time than the actual break, or is it just our lucky toaster?
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